threeisapattern | maybe the real supernatural magnet was Stiles all along

maybe the real supernatural magnet was Stiles all along

The thing about kanimas is that they're supposed to be super-rare, maybe one-in-a-generation. Most people, if they get the werewolf bite and their body rejects it, they die. It takes a special kind of mental unwellness to turn into a kanima instead. And Stiles has already been there, done that when Jackson transformed into one back in Beacon Hills.

So someone explain to him why he's staring one down in the middle of an otherwise deserted park. (So he was practicing some soccer drills on his own and it got late. So sue him if he kind of doesn't want to suck when he has a cute guy and the cute guy's family in addition to his dad vowing to watch him play.) For a second, he genuinely wonders if this is some kind of waking nightmare, and he glances down to count his fingers as a check (ten, no more and no less). In that time, it gets in way too close, and Stiles straight-out sprints for his bag to grab his phone and the little vial of emergency mountain ash he keeps with him at all times.

He has Billy's number dialed and his thumb on the top of the vial to flick it open when he feels a slash against his back, meaning he has a few seconds before his body stops responding. He hits the call button and throws the opened vial in the air as his muscles go slack and he drops to the ground. He doesn't think anything breaks, but he lands on his shoulder painfully hard and that's something he's going to have to deal with if he survives the next few minutes. Through some miracle of luck, desperation, and probably magic, the ash lands in an unbroken circle around his body, and he squeezes his eyes shut and believes with all of his might that a handful of wood ash has the power to protect him from the supernatural.

It works. The kanima hisses as it slashes at the barrier a couple times, and as Stiles watches it, he realizes that there's a voice trying to talk to him from his phone. It landed about a foot from his head and he must've managed to hit speaker before he dropped it, thank god, because there's absolutely no way he could pick it up right now.

"Hey, Billy? I really need your help right now, like - SOS."

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"Yeah." Okay, he knows Billy just means that they'd probably have privacy, but it does sting a little to be reminded that his dad spends so much time working, and it's basically impossible to hide that given that they're literally sharing minds right now. So - obviously, the only thing to do is move on and start walking again, because at least the Nemeton isn't in their way anymore.

The sting of sadness is not what he was expecting to feel after his suggestion, and even if he knows it isn't about him, it's hard to not feel a tad bit rejected. If Stiles wants to move on, then they will move on.

He's probably supposed to be thinking about the kanima, that's the whole point of this, but he's distracted. He can't tell if it's still Stiles sadness and loneliness or if they have just brought out his own, but he is entirely not surprised when a pair of shoes shoes up along their walk. Alice's shoes in particular, poised the way they were on the road, never collected, still waiting for her. He ignores them.

"How is the kanima even hiding so well? It's not like there is anything to go behind."

He still has Billy's hand in his, so he squeezes it when he feels an echo of what Billy's feeling. Being in each other's head is - not simple, definitely, especially given that they both of have plenty of issues to work through.

(The shoes are kind of a surprise, but if Billy doesn't want to talk about it - and he clearly doesn't - Stiles won't force anything.)

"I don't know the rules or anything, but I guess if you didn't want to be found, this is probably a pretty good place to hide. If all three of us are kind of contributing to this place, then he can probably make it really hard to find him."

It's helpful that Stiles is so understanding, or else this would be a hell of a lot worse. He appreciates that Stiles is letting him ignore his own contributions to this space, he's not sure he could deal with that on top of everything else. When they pass by Lilia's shoes, he holds Stiles hand a little tighter.

"If he is also influencing the space, shouldn't we start to see pieces of his mind? I doubt he's that good at holding back."

“Maybe our heads are too full.”

If that makes sense? They both have plenty of shit on their minds. “I’m really bad at anything like meditation, though. It’s the ADHD.”

That does make sense. He and Stiles are so caught up in what they have going on, it is getting in the way of this other kid. He actually kind of feels bad that they are forcing him to deal with all of this, who knows what he has discovered while he's been here.

"If distraction didn't work, and meditation is out...I don't mind being here with you, but I really don't want to be stuck here forever."

So far they haven't encountered anything too horrible, but he knows enough about Stiles past, and his own, to know they are just scraping the surface. He's not sure he's ready to dive deeper.

“We just try to focus on finding him again, I guess?”

Too bad they don’t have Scott here to do his alpha werewolf howl and force the guy out of hiding. Meanwhile, Stiles will attempt to clear his head of anything but the current goal as best he can, given that this basically goes against everything his brain is usually determined to do.

(If the echo of pain from his shoulder gets a bit stronger while he’s working on that, then - that would be no one’s business but his own if he wasn’t in a shared mind scape.)

"Right, okay."

Clearing his mind is easier said than done, he is trying but he keeps getting distracted. By Stiles' pain, by the thought of his traumas showing up again, by the fact that this is all within his control but somehow he's messing it up. When it comes to his powers, it feels like all he does is mess up.

He's vocalized some of his feelings of inadequacy before. What he hasn't talked about is the overwhelming amount of fear lurking beneath that inadequacy. Fear that every time he messes up, he may end up losing another person. Fear that even with powers, he won't be able to save the people he cares about.

It's not until Agatha's shoes show up that he stops, dropping Stiles hand so that he can cover his eyes instead, pressing into them until he can see stars.

"Sorry, I know it's me this time. I can make this go away, I just need a minute."

Okay, so obviously the better long-term solution for this is talking it out, but Stiles doesn't really want to have an impromptu therapy session in their minds for - a lot of reasons, honestly, not the least of which is that their bodies are probably still pretty vulnerable in the real world while they're at this. He can feel Billy's anxiety heightening by the second, so he opts for the extremely valid de-escalation method of distracting his boyfriend with his mouth.

It's not like Stiles doesn't have experience kissing as a distraction from the fucked-up situation you're in. Plus, they're officially boyfriends now, which means he probably has Boyfriend Rights(TM) or something to initiate plan Make Out With Billy Til He's Less Freaked Out.

It takes a minute for Billy's mind to catch up with what is happening. If he was able to think harder about it, he'd probably realize that's kind of the point of this tactic. To completely change the direction of Billy's thoughts.

When he does finally catch on, he kisses Stiles back probably a bit too enthusiastically, his hands reaching up to cling tightly to his shirt, still caught up in the emotions of losing him, of failing him. It takes a minute but he does start to calm down, his kisses becoming more gentle as his anxiety dissipates.

And Stiles says he doesn't have any magical powers.

Once he feels better, he stays there for a moment longer, putting his head down to rest against Stiles' shoulder, lingering in the comfort of his boyfriend's (boyfriend!) embrace.

Stiles would like to explore this again in more depth when it’s not a distraction tactic, but also, it’s a pretty nice distraction tactic. He’s more than willing to keep it going as long as Billy needs, and afterwards, he holds on tight for a while as the background stress he was feeling from Billy dissipates.

“Better?”

"Better."

It probably goes without saying that he feels better, considering Stiles is in his head, but he gives confirmation anyway, finally stepping away. When he looks back in front of them, the shoes he saw before are gone.

He takes Stiles' hand again as they start walking.

"Do you think he's going to remember any of this? The kanima. When he's human again."

Billy doesn't really hide who he is, well, not his orientation anyway, but there have been a lot of secrets coming up in their time in this space. He's not sure he would want all of that getting out.

“Probably not.”

He’s not quite as confident as he sounds about it, but it’s not like Jackson ever got his memories of being the kanima back. And if they’re going to worry about it, they should probably wait til the act of worrying is less likely to put any more obstacles in their path.

Speaking of? He’s pretty sure he sees the kanima in the distance now. “Oh, thank god.”

Who knew that all they had to do was make out and it would solve pretty much all of their problems? It's something Billy plans to bring up again when they aren't in mild peril. Are they in peril? As long as he stays focused, the kanima won't even have a chance to think about hurting anyone. Stiles can talk to him and Billy can be his magical body guard. It's not great, but it's a better plan then they had before.

"I'm sure you know what you are doing, but if he gets close to you, I'm blasting him."

“Thanks.” Billy gets a kiss on the cheek for being cute and overprotective.

It seems like probably the fastest way to get to the kanima now is to believe he can get to the kanima fast, which does actually work, more or less. At which point, he guesses this plan is kind of up to him.

Talking to the kanima is weird, in no small part because he can feel echoes of its feelings from the link Billy’s set u. It’s reacting more on animal instincts than human ones, which is what Stiles ends up focusing on - trying to help it return to a human way of thinking. He’s not a were, but he understands the concept of anchors, finding something to hold onto your humanity with. He’s not confident they’re doing great at finding one, but all of the sudden the kanima hisses at him and curls up on the ground, and then there’s a teen in front of him instead of a reptile - and hopefully that means there’s a human in real life now, too.

It's interesting being on this side of things, just watching as Stiles takes the lead. If he's not too busy with the task at hand, he would likely be feeling the admiration Billy feels while seeing him work, getting through to this kid on levels that Billy never would have even considered. He can't help being impressed.

When the teen shrinks down, an absolutely horrifying experience, Billy looks back at Stiles, "I guess now we see if it worked."

It doesn't take much effort to take them back to the real world, it was always there, like background noise but he ignored it, once he switches his focus, he easily moves them back into their own heads.

Even though he knew no time had passed, it is still always a weird experience to come back to where he was before. Like the most intense case of deja vu. Thankfully the teen stayed human here too, not that he really cares at all about that. He's more concerned with Stiles, who is still on the ground, still out of reach.

"Is the barrier still up?"

Back in The Real World(TM), Stiles is still in pain and still can’t really move - some serious effort and concentration gets him a finger twitch, but he can’t manage more than that.

“Gimme a minute to work on that.” Normally, he just breaks the barrier physically, but he should be able to do it mentally, right? He just has to stop believing it’s capable of protecting him. “Do me a favor, okay? Go make sure that guy’s human and give him my number, cause we need to make sure he has a pack that can help him.”

Ugh. Being responsible sucks, but he’d really rather make sure they have this shit sorted out tonight instead of waiting for something bad to happen again.

If Stiles could see Billy's reaction, he would probably notice how much he really doesn't want to step away, to take any of his attention off of his boyfriend. But he also recognizes that this is something Stiles knows a lot more about, and if this is how they solve it, then he's not going to argue.

He goes over to the teen, who is thankfully still human, and probably really freaked out, and really still needs therapy, and offers Stiles' number. He also makes sure he is okay, because Billy has manners and even though he is distracted, he's not going to be rude. He thinks he recognizes the guy from school, he hopes that doesn't mean they will run into each other, he still hasn't completely forgiven him for hurting Stiles, even if he wasn't fully aware of it.

Once a reasonable amount of polite time as passed, Billy makes his way back over to Stiles.

"Now that we've established the lizard is going to make a full recovery, how do we fix this?" He motions to the circle, he hasn't tried to cross it again, the first time was educational enough that he'll wait until there is some kind of sign it's fixed before retrying.

To be honest, Stiles didn't really want Billy to leave him, either, but he recognizes that they can't afford for the kanima to panic and run away and become a problem for another day. He could turn again and hurt someone else, or someone with way more sinister intentions could discover that a potential tool of violence is running around free.

While Billy's occupied, he focuses on the ash circle, on how it's powered by his sincere belief that it protects him. Now, he sincerely believes that it doesn't protect him, that it's just a handful of dust that poses no more barrier to Billy than the grass does.

"You can pass it."

The words are barely out of Stiles mouth and Billy is already rushing to him. It probably speaks to the level of trust they share that Billy doesn't hesitate to cross the ash once Stiles tells him it's safe. As promised, nothing happens as he steps into the circle. He kneels down to further assess the damage, trying not to touch Stiles much only because he doesn't want to make it worse.

"What do I do? How do I help?"

He didn't fall in the most comfortable or dignified position, and it really hasn't been helping him to have to stay in place this whole time. Not that it would have helped him to be attacked more by the kanima, either.

"I think I dislocated my shoulder, so if we could get my weight off that?"

Okay, he can do this. Gently, he moves Stiles onto his back, and then props him up some so that he is resting (hopefully) more comfortably on Billy's knees. His shoulder looks, pretty gross, popped out of place and at an odd angle. He puts his hand in Stiles hair, unsure what else he can do.

"Should I call the police?...Should I call your dad?"

“I don’t want to figure out how to explain the temporary paralysis to the cops or EMTs.”

It’s a pain. Well, maybe not as much of a pain as the actual dislocated shoulder, but still a pain. “ - If you call my dad, we have to explain what happened to him.”

Which. He doesn’t love that idea, either, even if he also doesn’t love the idea of lying to his dad again.

So they are stuck. He puts his hand on Stiles uninjured shoulder, squeezing it slightly. He wishes he knew more spells, that he could at least take Stiles pain away.

”How long does the paralysis last?”

"Hard to know for sure. It lasts longer if it gets into your blood, and he definitely caught me with a claw. I could kinda move my finger a little, though - that's a good sign."

He blinks up at Billy. "Still sure you wanna be my boyfriend? Apparently I suck at staying out of trouble."

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